Visiting My Sister

I leave for Lancaster, Ohio on Monday to visit my sister, Marlene. We visit regularly on the phone but have not seen each other face to face for several years. In the past few months I have increasingly felt a strong need to spend some time with her. Our sisterly experience is somewhat unusual. As I have said in earlier journals, we were not raised together. My twin and I, the youngest of eight, were adopted when we were less than two years old. My next brother and sister were also adopted by a different set of parents. All of this happened because of the death of our natural mother a few months after my brother and I, the twins, were born.

My sister and I have only known each other for the past thirty years and have spent only a few times together, either when I visited her or she visited me. So in one way we know very little about each other, even though we are both in our sixties now. Even so, we feel close and have found a special bond. The past year or so there has been some kind of misunderstanding that has caused my sister to withdraw. I really don't know the cause but am determined to find out and heal the preceived wound she feels she has suffered. The last thing I want is for us to be less than sisters. I love her and I know she loves me. If I have done or said something that has truly hurt her, I want to heal that hurt. I want us to move beyond that hurt. I hope I can get her to hear me and put aside whatever it is that has put up a wall between us.

Family discord is such a sad thing. I have never really known what it is like to have family ties. I treasure the possibility. I hope anyone who reads my journal and has rifts in the family will do something to heal that rift. Don't wait for the other party to make a move. Love should be above the petty things of everyday life. Life is too short. I learned that the hard way when my twin died suddenly. I had let years pass by without keeping in contact. And there were no disagreements between us...just time and distance. If you can not love your brother or your sister, how can you love anyone else? How can you love yourself.

I will let you know how things go with my sister and me. I know just being together, face to face, will make a difference. I just want her to know I love her and nothing can come between us as sisters.